It’s never too late to start over, sometimes the self critic in our head likes to tell us that we’re incapable of it. Physically, we might be broken, mentally we may feel betrayed, angry, and fearful of not finding our way back.

Sometimes it’s just that first step, that first thought you put into action, the first goal you set for yourself again.

It’s been 13 weeks, and sometimes the future is just looking grey; sometimes I think it’s because it’s not written yet, sometimes it’s the bleakness of my own head, sometimes it’s the pain consuming my energy.

Each week I’ve been trying to do one small task item to start rebuilding who I was and who I’m going to become now.

This week, I’m trying to add a bit more movement, I have new exercises to work on rebuilding my arm, and I’m trying to quiet Gladys down with a small walk.

To go from running outside through the trees with my dog, feeling the wind in my hair and that determination of being able to do multi reps with the weights, the mentality of being in my own body and head and getting lost in those moments are what I’m missing the most.

So this week, my small task is trying to re-create or I should say create a new moment by losing myself in the things that I can enjoy and the modified movements.

I found that playlist that always made my feet want to move harder and faster, to push it. I took myself downstairs to my gym, that alone is a workout in itself. The feeling of just returning there gives me hope.

I may be in my pyjamas, but I stepped on my treadmill for the first time and immediately started to cry. It’s interesting how we grieve after a severe injury trying to put those puzzle pieces back together, as though a piece is missing and lost. Wondering if the piece will return one day when you least expect it.

The music was thumping, I still have to hang on, but one step in front of the other and I’m farther than I was yesterday.

I am the tortoise, slow steady meticulous thought into each movement. One goal, each day and I guess we will see where this process takes me.

As always love from the journey filled Woman in Process